This time I am going to reflect back my 2010. Once, my friend asked me "how do you think of 2010, now is December.."
well...well.... All of sudden every moment flashed in my mind. What I have done so far..? what things i feel not satisfied? and in the end I can't regret of everything happened in my 2010.. what I can say "each year has different story, different moment and different goal"
This year I have noticed something changed with myself either I'm going mature or less mature :/ haha..
anyway, I realize Who Am I indeed. I am still a shy and reserved girl but this year I could do something that I would have never imagined. I do not have to explain what I did here. I could have lost the "OLD" me. Fortunately, it does not happen.
Thanks to people who I met this year with their totally opposite mind, attitude and behavior. The good thing is I can stand on myself, cause it is morality and psychologically challenging. I can't judge how bad people from their behavior because I know I am not good enough and not my business though. And it is totally wrong if I am comparing myself with others~ Everyone has different world.
"Letting go" lesson~ I saw how hard to let go someone who we love (because he/she leaves you or you have to leave him/her). Tears, angers, hatred, and denial. Forgive is the hardest part and I believe the harder we can forgive this person, the harder we can forget. By the way, it is not only about love issue, also for every relationship we have with family, relatives, and friends.
It is easily to say yeah.. I know. What I know, it is important to protect your own heart and yourself. After all, it is just mind-game where we do not focus much on how suffer and desperate your life cause actually it is not as worst as you think.
I met many people and see how people actually lost in their life, you know you're not alone. And some people who are really confidence with their life path and success. I might be the one who still do not know my future and I am desperately need a stable life. Every night I tell to myself, Ok, D.. what's next? what are you going to do next? a year has gone. My mood was up and down lately. I have finished all things here (just a little more) and I'm ready for the next stage of my life..
I would miss all FUN and relax time in Malaysia (maybe relax is not the right word because I always have something to do, finding something to make me busy or just to kill my time. I'm easily bored actually. However, it is considered as RELAX compare than super busy women at my age).
In the end, again, I'm struggling with myself, "Come on! what do you want?!" ~~!!
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